Sara has a flair for the dramatic. To say the least. It comes out at the most inopportune times. Her life can go from wonderful and fabulous to terrible and tragic in the blink of an eye. Anyone or anything can cause these mercurial mood swings, usually a brother or a parent is the direct or indirect cause. It is all or nothing with that child.
Since summer vacation started, the kids have been fighting over anything, everything and nothing. My solution is simple. When they fight, they get separated and the fought-over issue/item is removed. She is free to play in her room.
The other day, Sara was outlining in graphic detail the many tragedies she suffers on a daily basis. We never let her do anything fun. We never take her anywhere. And so on and so on. Then she went in for the kill. "Christian gets all the attention. He gets everything he wants because he whines."
I am a stay-at-home mom of a school-aged daughter and not-quite-school-age son. I am passionate about my family, friends, writing, running and crafts. I'm a regular mom trying to survive the crazy world of parenthood.
I remained calm but wanted to say "Are you bloody kidding me? Have you ever kept track of all your insane and ridiculous requests, demands and wacky ideas? I have, kid. You ask for approximately 9.4 thousand things a day, including but not limited to, eating marshmallows all day, watching endless TV, Wii or computer time that would make you blind if indulged. Let's not forget requests to go to the zoo, Health Works Museum daily (usually during nap)."
But, I kept my mouth shut while I came up with a calm reasoned response. I asked her to think about what really happens when her brother whines. Does he REALLY get what he wants? Well, nooooo but.... What happens when he whines? Well, he is told no and if he keeps whining, he gets put in a time out. Ok, complaint number one is resolved for the time being.
About your claim of unequal attention given to your almost 4-year-old brother who is part-monkey and thinks he lives in the jungle? Well, Sara, actually, your brother gets more SUPERVISION because of his age and penchant for climbing on everything and anything. Attention and supervision are two different things. You got the same supervision at that age, kiddo. It is common sense to keep a close eye on small, active children, especially those who think they are part-superhero with the ability to fly. He gets more supervision but you get more independence and freedom.
Fair is not everyone getting the same thing. It isn't even everyone getting what they want. Fair is everyone getting what they need. And, in this house, we NEED to keep an eye on your brother to keep him alive with his limbs still attached.
Fair would be giving me a break from the fighting from time to time. Because I NEED a break from it.
To read more from Barb, visit My Crazy Life - Live, Laugh, Love
Designed by Gray Digital Media