I have a dirty secret that may get me kicked out of the “Mom Club.”
I am a working mom … and I love it.
I know. A mother saying that is considered taboo, but I love my job and I love getting out of the house every day.
I really tried to do the stay-at-home gig, but I just felt like a monumental failure.
I was a good housewife and mom for about five years before I decided to go back to work. I liked being able to be home to see my youngest grow from infant into school age (I didn’t have that luxury with my oldest).
I did everything you do when you are home with a young child – play dates, library trips and any other activity we could find to entertain and stimulate him. I dutifully did household chores and made sure dinner was on the table most every night.
Something was missing, though. I didn’t feel like I had an identity anymore. I went from having a name to just being Jack’s Mom. I was lost and felt like my kids had become my identity.
While I adore the role of mom, I needed something else. I was not finding satisfaction in mopping the floors and watching puppet shows at story time. I needed stimulation and a purpose that I could not get from my kids. So I decided to jump back into the workforce.
I will admit that it was not easy at first. I had to wrangle kids’ schedules with a work schedule and my job as a mom and wife on top of that. I feel like I went from having one job to having two.
There are days when it is still hard. I struggle with guilt, wondering if I made the correct choice or if I was selfish to put me ahead of my family’s needs. I just needed to feel worth in something besides my skill at being a mom. I work very hard at my job and I love coming to work every day. Not many people can say that.
I feel like I make a difference at work and I truly enjoy what I do.
Like everything else, though, some days are harder than others. There are days when my kids need me as much as my job needs me. Those days, my multitasking skills are really put to the test!
Am I doing a good job and setting a great example for my boys?
Absolutely. They have a much broader view of what a woman can do in this world. I want my boys to realize that I can still make them dinner and bake cupcakes for their class and still go to work and enjoy my job. I want to challenge the way they perceive what women’s work is and hopefully change their future relationships for the best.
I know what I do is not for every woman, but I feel like it has been the best fit for me and my family.
Kristi Davis is married with two sons. She blogs regularly for fruitamoms.com.