Adventures in Babysitting

Danielle Herzog

This article, entitled Adventures in Babysitting comes from Danielle Herzog's blog Martinis and Minivans at martinisandminivans.com.

I’m not pregnant. However, the 4-year-old I had over for a play date this morning thinks otherwise. His quote to me – ”Looks like you’ve got a baby growing in your belly – it’s kinda big.”

Suck it, kid. If it’s a baby then her name is Little Debbie.

However, the fun didn’t end there.

My favorite quote came while changing my son’s diaper. The little boy then said, “I changed my stuffed animal’s diaper one time. Hey, want to see my butt cheek?”

The tea immediately came spitting out of my mouth at that one. However, I didn’t have time to answer before he literally pulled down his pants and proceeded to show me his butt cheek. That, in itself, was odd, but the crazier thing was that there was nothing spectacular to see on his butt. No moles, beauty marks, leftover marker from a crazy night with the boys. He simply wanted to show me his actual butt cheek.

The play date ended with him telling my 4-year-old daughter this, “I’m not going to marry you but you can still come over to my house sometime.” I’m not sure if she actually expressed an interest in marrying him without my knowledge but I like a guy that is honest from the beginning. I appreciate it, kid. You’re welcome back anytime. Just keep your eyes away from my stomach next time, ok?



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