I am not a "By the Book" Mom!

Liz Fogle

I am not a “by the book” mother. What I mean by this is, I don’t own any parenting books or what to expect in the first years books or how to books on raising kids (is that weird?). I may occasionally read a parenting article I stumble across online or in a magazine, but I don’t take the time to read a parenting book. I don’t know why I never purchased any parenting books; I guess my husband (Ben) and I thought we could figure it out (lol…sometimes successfully and sometimes not). In all honesty, I think some of the reasons I never purchased a parenting book was the fear that they would make me feel like a dummy or less of a parent. I also didn’t want the books to create any unnecessary fears or worries about raising Bug (my daughter).

Does this make me wacko or is this completely normal? I know I am not the perfect parent (remember the tantrum blog), but we seem to be doing okay with a book.

I actually tried to read a parenting book recently. My husband saw the book and asked “what is this? (I knew he would question it). All I could say was a friend recommended it to me. Epic Failure! I got about 30 pages in and gave up. My friend encouraged me to finish the book, but I couldn’t do it!! My friend kept saying “there is advice and help in there”. I didn’t find any! I guess it was later in the book.

I don’t see anything wrong with owning or following what parenting books say. I have friends that have had tremendous success with certain parenting books. They have helped their children sleep better, deal with behavioral issues, or even eat better. I am just not a “by the book” mother.

There is a reason for my blog (I promise)! A new parenting book and style is making headlines. The book “Beyond the Sling” is authored by Mayim Bialik (mother of 2 and former star of Blossom and now The Big Bang Theory). The book emphasizes the idea of attachment parenting. Bialik did a big media tour with her book and talked about what attachment parenting looked like in her home. I caught one of her interviews and here are a few things she addressed : her family all sleeping in the same bed and/or room, using a toilet training method known as the “elimination technique” (her children were potty trained by 1), and not forcing her children to share or say “please” and “thank you” (WHAT???...this is the one that blew me away. Bialik also struggled with it). She also said in the interview that this style of parenting was not for everyone, but that it worked for her family. Bialik said, the important thing was watching your child cues and developing your own style of parenting because every family and child is not the same.

I loved that she didn’t force her parenting style down my throat and say attachment parenting is the only way to raise a child. I also didn’t feel like she was forcing me to jump on some “bandwagon”. I know that attachment parenting will not work for my family, but I applaud her for giving moms another resource or guide for parenting.

So moms, do you have a style of parenting you follow or try to follow with your children? What have been some of your successes or failures? Also where do you get you’re parenting advice? Do you read parenting books or magazine, look at articles online, consult fellow mothers or do you just kind of wing it?

I don’t know what kind of parenting style we follow. I guess a bit of prayer, life experience, discipline, and love all rolled in together! I guess my only desire as a mother is to do the best job possible and for Bug to grow up a well adjusted, respectful, Godly young woman.

Can’t wait to hear from you!